Dear Emily

(I wrote this to Emily a few days ago, just before Emily left for the US and I share it with her permission)

Dear Emily,

As I write this, you are still asleep in your room.  In less than 24 hours, you will be on a plane headed back to the US and into a whole new chapter of all of our lives. Yesterday, when you were out with your friends and mom and I were packing your things, the reality of your impending departure really hit home, and now waves of sadness have begun to hit me.  Yeah – your “tough” Marine daddy was crying yesterday, and I am crying as I write this.  I guess I didn’t expect it to hit me quite like this. 

Your mother and I have known since God gave you to us that our time with you in our home would be limited.  We have tried to be good parents, tried to teach you the things and skills you would need for the day when you would leave our house and go out on your own.  Now that the day is almost upon us, I have to admit that I am wishing we could push back the clock a bit.  You know that we have been joking about “when the nest is empty, the party will start” – but now, as you stand on the edge of the nest, about to try out your wings, I find myself filled with a mixture of pride and sadness.  Your brother and sister have both “made the leap” just fine, and I know that you will be fine too – our Heavenly Father will be watching over you and caring for you in ways that this earthly dad never could.

You are an incredible young lady.  I know that you are going to do well at school and that you will have fun – eventually.  After the first few weeks of uncertainty, you will settle into the routine of classes, with new friends and all sorts of new experiences – some will be fun, others perhaps not so much.  As you step out on your own and find that your wings have more strength than you realize, we will be watching, and praying, and bragging about what fabulous kids God has given to us.

I love you.  I hope you understand that. Nothing you could ever do will change that. Nothing. Your mom and I will ALWAYS be here for you no matter what.  You may make some decisions in the future that we might not fully agree with, but we will always be here for you to talk through things.  As much as I love you (and there are not words in any language to fully capture how much that is), I know that God loves you more.  And so, as we did shortly after your birth, I am giving you to Him once again.  I am praying that He will make his presence known to you as you step out into some unfamiliar territory.  I am praying that He will provide for you all of the things that your mom and I didn’t, or couldn’t.  I am praying that someday (not too soon!) He will lead you to a Godly young man who will love you as much as Christ loves the church – and as much as I have tried to model loving your mom.

It helps to know that in a couple of months we will be back in the US too – that we will see you for the holidays.  I’d really be a basket case if we didn’t have that already planned.  By the time you read this, you will be back in the US.  As you head off into unknown territory, your mom and I will be back in territory we have not traveled through in over 21 years – a house with no kids in it.  It will take some getting used to on our part too.  I will miss hearing you out on the piano. I will really miss being able to kiss you goodnight.  I will miss seeing you in the worship team.  But just like closing out one chapter in a good book, I know that the next chapter will have some pretty cool stuff in it too. Let’s turn the page and see where it goes from here.

Love,

Your Babi

(photos courtesy of Kirlique Photography copyright 2012)